Sorry, Sheryl, I haven't a square to spare.

Sheryl Crow wants to ban excessive toilet paper use.

Will the idiocy and immorality of environmental alarmists never cease?

Now Sheryl Crow apparently wants to ban people from using too much toilet paper. (Here’s the BBC on it.)

Sorry, Sheryl, one square, or even three, just aren’t enough. I’ll use however much I damn well please, thank you very much.

It’s all well and good to be concerned about the environment and advocate voluntary measures to improve it, although it is obvious to anyone who does a little research that Al Gore’s alarmist brand of environmentalism exaggerates immensely from even the “consensus”, but it is another thing entirely to advocate rights-violations and useless nonsense like this.

Aside from the unjust statism inherent in Crow’s idea, what economic and environmental good will it do? It certainly won’t help the economy or improve people’s lives. And does Crow think we are running out of trees? Many environmentalists often speak as if we are, as if trees aren’t a renewable resource that are generally replanted by tree farming firms after each harvest.

Oprah, at least, to my knowledge simply tries to persuade us to use one less napkin a day (among other voluntary measures).

Crow also seems to think she’s the American People, or at least their spokeswoman. She’s not mine. I wish she would just speak for herself.

And what’s this “dining sleeve” invention she is talking about? She wants us to wipe our mouths on detachable shirt sleeves? How barbaric!

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Update (4/27): Sheryl is now claiming that her toilet paper “suggestion” was a joke. Perhaps she’s telling the truth. It was a ridiculous “suggestion.” On the other hand, environmentalists have said crazy things before and she is only a rock star, not a scientist or an economist. It is equally possible she realized how ridiculous it was only after the fact…after countless people ridiculed her for it…and then she decided to let us in on “the joke” in an attempt to save face. You decide.